The call has been made. Now she sprays the worktop first with Mr Muscle then wipes the whole\u00a0surface down. Spotless. Then she repeats, cleaning each unit door carefully.<\/p>\n
Pulls out the bread knife, the\u00a0only sharp blade in the house, rinses it in hot water and puts a few\u00a0drops of Fairy on the scourer before wiping it super clean. Rinses again. Dries with the clean tea\u00a0towel from Bognor. Takes off the blue nitrile gloves, her striped blue and white pinny and dumps\u00a0the lot in the pedal bin.<\/p>\n
The bread is cool enough now and, with care, she cuts off the crust before sawing two perfect\u00a0slices. Woman\u2019s Hour has finished and Moneybox is droning in the background. Rich people\u00a0ringing in anxiously to find out how they can be richer. She\u2019s thinking about the arguments.\u00a0Always about money.<\/p>\n
Two slices in the toaster, set to the lightest shade. Now she takes the cherry tomatoes, spring\u00a0onions, iceberg and, using the bread knife, prepares the salad filling. She\u2019s veering to the\u00a0vegetarian but that weakness for fish gets in the way. Stepping over, she takes a small tin of Aldi\u00a0Ocean Rise from the bottom cupboard, and begins the struggle with the opener. It\u2019s the 21st\u00a0century, why are they still so crap? Finally, the lid springs free and she drains the brine before\u00a0easing the tuna flakes into a small bowl. Adds a touch of luxury with a dollop of Hellmann\u2019s and\u00a0mixes it in just as the toaster pops. Perfect.<\/p>\n
A thin spread of Flora on both slices, then she builds the sandwich. Lettuce bed first, tomato\u00a0halves then a sprinkle of onions before spooning out the tuna. On cue, the cat appears, looks a\u00a0little put out for a moment, then heads over to the empty tuna tin for lickings. Bowl in the\u00a0dishwasher.<\/p>\n
A touch of salt for the seasoning and it\u2019s on with the lid. She cuts diagonally into exact halves,\u00a0which are then put onto the one remaining china plate. This she takes to the table and places it\u00a0gently down.<\/p>\n
Fills the kettle and puts a bag of Tetley\u2019s in her favourite mug, the one that says A clean house is\u00a0a sign of a wasted life<\/em>. Plenty of irony there, she thinks, looking over her shoulder. She stares out\u00a0of the window and hums along as the kettle gets up steam. Boiling water into the mug, a quick\u00a0poke with the teaspoon, hooks out the bag and dumps it in the bin like a pro. A splash of milk and\u00a0a stir. No sugar, no.<\/p>\n The mug on the table just so. It\u2019s a fine lunch if she says so herself. One more thing. She takes\u00a0the bread knife, rinses and wipes it with the Bognor towel. Steps over, bends down and slowly\u00a0pushes the blade back into her husband\u2019s chest.<\/p>\n A small sigh before sitting down to enjoy the sandwich, waiting to see what might happen next.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n John Adams<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The call has been made. Now she sprays the worktop first with Mr Muscle then wipes the whole\u00a0surface down. Spotless. Then she repeats, cleaning each…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1735,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[6],"tags":[269],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1718"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1718"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1718\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1730,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1718\/revisions\/1730"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1735"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1718"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1718"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/archive.nclacommunity.org\/content\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1718"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}